In search of the Dutchmans Pipe. ( I don’t know if this is a euphemism for the hash).
What can I say this had all the makings of a spectacular hash with over 30 would be hashers turning up at the Corner bar in Bedar. Slaggered aptly named, ( You have to be a redundant miner from Yorkshire to understand this) and Stripper of course keeping true to form arriving just as the rest were leaving.
A number of Virgins and visitors honoured us with their presence albeit only on the walk. Little did they know that this was a cunning ploy on Necrophiliac and Shakin Willies part to encourage more runners.
The walk it seems was far more arduous and certainly longer than the actual hash. Not only were they made to walk for 2 hours they also had to find and identify various indigenous flora and be expected to rescue imported fauna from a half empty Balsa. Three hashers were required to remove Ludovic from his newly found watering hole. This episode alone was worthy of a half hour programme of Human Planet. Talking of watering holes Bogtrotter decided to show her watering hole to a passing motorist, who promptly through his hands up in the air and appeared to shout Pissing Hashers, or words to that effect. Some people just don’t know when to look a gift horse in the mouth.
But what I hear you say of the actual hash, well to be honest nothing out of the ordinary other than the 4 nameless hashers taking advantage of the Kingfisherless Queenfisher as she lay recumbant on a convenient bench by a fuente while Necrophiliac crawled into and out of yet another hole. He was also seen surveying a second hole before arriving back at the start, where he mistakenly made it known that whilst setting the trail he managed to entice 2 children into one of the tunnels. In his words he scared the Sh-t out of them. Now you know why we have hash names, andis it worthy of a name change.Although changing hash names does have a tendency to confuse the RA . Remember TwoHats, No cents is now called SatNav Too. No that isn’t a typo. Talking of names could there be a better name than Cunning Linguist (answers on a post card) visiting us from just down the road Los Gallardos as it happens, having left her native island somwhere under the Pacific after contracting Foot and Mouth who assures us he is an animal nutritionist. He is most definitely an animal, I don’t know about his eating habits.
The walkers taking so long meant that Puff at the behest of KeyFOB took the car to find the walkers, or more precisely the key to the car with the beer, only to be foiled by Screw on the Loose, who had scrambled up a goat track. Nothing comes between a Screw and a beer. Not even a Dutchmans Pipe. I always thought they were Dutch Caps.