It was a bright and sunny start to the “Hash That Wasn’t a Hash” in Yegua Alta this morning. Twenty Indalo Hash House Harriers (and almost as many dogs) descended upon the usually quiet hamlet of Yegua Alta ready for a brisk walk/run in the sunshine.
The Hares attempted to shut us all up for five minutes while the routes were explained. Don’t ask mje how many variations on the hash routes there were… I don’t have a Scooby… and neither did one or two of the Hares apparently. We swear it was being made up as they went along. But that didn’t put us off – big smiles and bigger strides saw us all heading out in a couple of different directions among the almond trees and lanes surrounding Yegua Alta.
Due to general malaise, flu recovery, injuries and absenteeism it soon became apparent that Key Fob would be the only runner (well, nobody wanted to talk to him anyway) so the walkers split into two groups. One for a short hash and one for a short short hash. The short hash had disguised itself as a long hash and the short short hash turned into the “who the hell knows where we’re going and where has Non Cents disappeared off to again hash,” which included a 15 minute stop while we waited for him to catch up.
After the intrepid walkers returned and tucked into refreshments supplied by temporary Beermeisters Keyfob and Bog Trotter, the circle was formed and various punishments were doled out. Before we list those though… it must be noted that a number of hashers escaped – notably some for sitting down on the hash, all hashers for sitting down for the closing circle, and Key Fob for almost wearing his hat.
The following received down downs while the rest of us mumbled our way through a few ditties – sin songsheets… interspersed with the occasional grumble from Norman Bates who couldn’t hear himself think while others carried on jabbering. Oh and Non Cents suggested the Bahamas for the next hash and has kindly offered to pay for everyone (does Paramedic know?!)
- Hares: Paramedic, Non Cents, Big Nuts and Key Fob
- FRBs: Necrophilia and the Front Running Belgians
- Taking the hash that wasn’t a hash too seriously: Necrophilia. He went on to protest that he wasn’t “setting a false trail” but was “watering the campo.” Therefore… … …
- Watering the campo: Necrophilia, Flowery Knickers and Bog Trotter (there’s a surprise).
- Impersonating a caganer: Bart
- Getting more blue paint on themselves than the trail, and double marking: Big Nuts and Non Cents
As a number of us were getting grumbly and desperate to tuck into the fine fayre lovingly cooked by Paramedic, the circle closed and there was a mad dash for the kitchen. Massive thanks go to Paramedic for her magnificent chilli con carne (with chocolate) and excellent vegetable curry. Both were served with rice, bread, a smile and more plonk.
The next hour or two were spent basking in the sunshine and generally catching up with everyone’s news – great chats as always.
We all drifted off little by little (some in their chairs) after an excellent meet up.
Quote of the Day:
Non Cents: “Were you impressed?”
Clickit: “Of course I was impressed – I was laying on your bed”
Remember – Slot Machine is always listening
Announcements (to be fair I wasn’t listening properly, so there may be info missing from here)
- Next hash is in Cucador, hosted by Arse Ogler and Vladilostcock.
- If you are at a loose end at 2pm March 17, head to Lorca and support Paramedic who will singing her socks off.
- Stripper and Slaggard are having a Party on March 26 from 4pm. The hashers (surprisingly) are invited. Key Fob articulates, “This is your personal invite. You are the chosen one. Remember this is the eve of the Hunt the Bunny or post Erection Hash, so a good excuse to let your hair down. Bring a bottle/cans (preferably containing alcohol or whatever you want to drink) bring a plate with something edible.This will be a pan European event so brush up on your second, third and fourth languages. Venue is Stripper and Slaggard’s casa (Arboleas). RSVP to email@example.com by March 19.
- I am sure that the other Hashers will join me in sending our warmest wishes to the absentees who are suffering from ill health, caring for loved ones, or grieving.
Puff’s Pics – click HERE